Please be okay

A lot of things happened today, and I would like to get them out.

For starters, I think, I sincerely hope, that I helped save a life today.

One of my friends was depressed and slightly suicidal. He and his girlfriend had broken up a month ago, and he wasn't taking it well. I knew he was getting drunk and everything, and I was worried about him. I had another friend check up on him, and apparently everything was all good with him yesterday. But tonight things went wrong. Very wrong.

I'm still in Hawaii and it's nighttime and my brother and I were getting ready to leave the room to explore. I was texting my friend and he asked me a strange question about his wrist and if there were any nerves or important things on the top of it. I immediately thought that he was going to cut himself, so I kept saying that he shouldn't do it, that if he did it'll hurt me and other people as well. My brother and I left the room at this point and we're just playing in the water, and I was casually texting my friend. I didn't hear my text tone or feel the vibration so I didn't know he texted me back until my phone started ringing. He called me and I answered. He was drunk and giddy and he kept saying that he "did it." I knew what he meant but I wanted confirmation so I kept asking questions about what he did. He said he drew happy faces, and I asked where the happy faces were. He said that they were on his arm and I asked what he used to draw the happy faces, and he said he used a razor. That's all I needed to know to kick into overdrive. He hung up with me and I called my friend who lives in the same town as us. He didn't respond, so I tried my friend's ex-girlfriend, because she had previously texted me earlier to see how I was doing. I let her know what was happening and what he was doing to keep her updated.

I wasn't sure what I should do because I wasn't sure if he was suicidal or anything. My friend that lives in the same town as us called me back and I explained to him what was happening. He wasn't sure what I should do or what he should do. I told him that I was going to call the local police and see if they could give me advice on what to do. I told my friend that he should go and check up on him, but to hold off so I can make a decision on what to do. I guess we were in mutual agreement that if he got worse, my friend would go over and see what he could do. My brother recommended that I should not call the police (what I was planning on doing), that I should call the suicide hotline number and ask what I should do. I called hotline and asked them what I should do. They were helpful enough and said I was doing the right thing by sending a friend over to check on him, and that if my friend developed a plan, time frame, or anything like that, that's when I should call the police.

I was continuously texting my unhappy friend and making sure he was alright and checking up on him, when all of a sudden he stops responding to my texts. I get a frantic text from his ex girlfriend telling me that I need to call him as soon as possible. I called him and asked him what was wrong, and apparently he had texted me but I didn't receive it til later. I read the text and found out what had upset him, and he then told me that he didn't want to talk, and he wanted to be alone and he wasn't going to speak to me for a while. I respected that and hung up with him.

About 20 minutes later, the unhappy friend wanted to FaceTime with me, and I accepted, and he was in awful shape. He looked slightly insane. He showed me his cuts, he was shaking and smiling and telling me he wasn't okay, and his sentences were all over the place. The one thing he said that triggered me to help was that he said he needed help. I've been telling him for so long that he needs help, but he always said he didn't. This time he did, and I wanted to act on it even though I'm thousands of miles away. He wanted to hang up on me, but I wanted him to stay on FaceTime with me a bit longer, but he just hung up. I then called my friend that lives in the same town as us right away to tell him what had just happened. Luckily my friend said that unhappy friend had just called  him (didn't really say anything) and that friend who lives in same town was on his way to check on unhappy friend.

Friend that lives in same town goes to unhappy friend's house and unhappy friend immediately tells him to go take him to the police station so he could turn himself in. He turns himself in and friend who lives in same town leaves to call me about what just happened.

And that's where my story will end for now. I don't know. I really want him to be okay, and yeah. I'm grateful that my friends were here and there when I needed them the most. Also, keep in mind, when all of this is happening I'm walking around Waikiki, trying to be normal while having all this going on, and it was really eating at me. Keep in mind that this is the ultra short, condensed version of what was happening.

That's why I'm still awake. I know that my friend is safe, but I'm still worried. There isn't anything I can do though. As soon as I get back, I'll be able to do more, but for now, I can't do anything, and that's what I hate the most. I want to believe that I saved someone's life today, but at the same time I know that I didn't. I just orchestrated everything. And yeah, that's cool too. If I could, I would be a superhero. But I just don't have the time and energy to save the world. I can try, though. I feel like I did the right thing, but I also feel guilty because I wasn't there physically to help.

Anyways, huge shout out to the friend that's in town for helping me out so much. I owe you big time. I can't thank you enough for being there when I needed you. I'm so glad you're one of my closest friends.

M and E

A few days ago I met this amazing two year old boy. We'll call him M for privacy concerns.

He's had a tough life, and I'm really happy he's safe and happy where he is now.

So, here's a back story about M.

His parents divorced very soon after M was born. Because his father was in the military services, M's mom and dad had joint custody. So of course, for the first few months M was with his mom. M would spend nine months with his mom, and nine months with his dad/grandparents, I guess. I know that M's grandpa retired to help take care of him, and they live in a different state. I think the M's dad lives with his parents, but is currently out of state working and going to school. I'm not sure how the set up worked. Anyways, M's mom got a boyfriend, and around this time M was around 18 months. His grandparents had just had M for the past few months, and M was around 25 pounds, which I guess is healthy for that age. M goes back to his mom for the next few months, and then comes back to his grandparent's house. When the grandparents got him back, they were shocked to see that he was a whopping like, 9 pounds. He lost weight while at his mom's house. Now, this part gets a little fuzzy for me because I'm not sure what happened, and this part might be out of order. So M is at his mom's house and he suddenly becomes unconscious. M's mom and her boyfriend call 911 and get him to the hospital. Now, an extended family member from the dad's side just so happened to check her Facebook (wasn't deleted from the friend's list) and saw that M's mom was tagged in a status that involved M. Apparently M had a seizure and was in a half coma and things were not looking well. So the family member immediately contacted the grandparent who had no idea what was happening, and tried booking a flight out to be with their grandson immediately. M's dad was already on the way. (Small detail I left out: the M's mom and boyfriend lied to the hospital staff and said that they were the parents. The grandparents called the hospital for more information and the hospital staff was confused because they thought the biological dad was the boyfriend. So there was a lot of documents that were being faxed, and CPS was called.) Long story short, M was being abused, mentally and physically. When M got to the hospital, they found out he had multiple broken bones that were healing at different stages, he had a brain hemorrhage that caused his seizures, and every time the boyfriend would step into the hospital room while M wasn't in a half coma, he would scream and cry. His abuse was so bad that M couldn't feel his legs anymore and whenever he was given food, he would hoard it because he thought people would take it away from him. M's brain hemorrhage prevented him from doing a lot of things. He had to relearn walking and talking. They didn't know how bad the damage would be from the hemorrhage and to prepare for the worst. The hemorrhage had affected the majority of the left side of his brain. They weren't sure if he would be able to walk, talk and function normally.

The good news about M is that as of now, he's doing much better. He's talking more, he can walk, and he's well on his way to recovery. He's doing great. Just looking at him you wouldn't have known he had gone through all of this. He's one brave boy, and I admire him. He's adorable, and what shocked me the most was that he wasn't afraid of me or my dad or my mom. He actually went up to me and said "Hi!" and grabbed at my hand. He really liked me. And he would love to be carried and he would grab things and give them to me. Whatever he did, he would always come back to me, and that really made me appreciate him. He's been through so much at such a young age, but yet, he still has trust. I know he's still a baby, and he doesn't know any better, but the fact that he's made such a remarkable recovery is just amazing in itself.

Here's another story about a girl named E.

I've known E since she was a baby. Her story starts off sad, but has a good ending. So my mom's friends, we'll call them J and V, went to China on vacation once. I guess they were walking by a dumpster or an alley or where ever, and they hear this baby crying inside the dumpster. So they picked out the baby girl and brought her to the orphanage. Again, this part gets a little fuzzy for me because remember what happens, but they left China after they brought her to the orphanage, but they couldn't stop thinking about her and her future. So once they got back to the States, they decided they wanted to adopt the baby girl they found in the dumpster. After years of going through the system and a lot of visits, they finally brought her home. 

She's really something. She's smart, talented and completely fearless. When I met her she was only a baby, but I got to watch her grow up over time. She's in fourth grade now, and it's like, "wow, how time flies." I guess the best part about this is that she has parents that actually love her who care about her a lot. When she was old enough to talk and communicate, she was absolutely fearless. She really liked talking to me and she really took a shine to me (yeah, all these kids like me). I remember one year, I wasn't able to see her, and my parents were there and apparently she remembered me and wanted to talk to me! So they put her on the phone and we had a nice talk. I can't remember what we talked about but we talked. I saw her a few days ago. Wow, she's grown. She's a lot more, self-aware, in the sense of she's really quiet now, didn't talk as much as she used to. But that's okay. She's also talented in the way that she plays piano, has concerts, and is also in choir and she sings. She's going to do great things, I just know it. And she's adorable. Reminds me a little bit of myself when I was younger.

End.