Monday, February 12, 2018

Purple Jade Bracelet

[Originally posted 2/25/12, 1:27AM PDT]


Something to cherish

Purple jade bracelet. I'm wearing it now. I remember when I received this bracelet. Hawaii, around Christmastime at Auntie Carol's house. I was only a 6 or 7th grader, and my favorite color was purple at the time. Sitting on those stools in the kitchen, they said to me, "This is purple jade, it's super expensive. Don't lose it." Then they gave me the tiny white box that this bracelet contained. I opened the box, and I remembered feeling so overwhelmed. My grandparents had bought me something so costly when they were having financial troubles, and I was touched. I knew upon touching the bracelet that I would cherish it forever. It sounds so corny, but 5 to 6 years later, I still have it. I only wear it on the occasion that I remember I have it. I always know where it is, I never wear it, for fear that it'll be stolen from me, it'll break, or it'll fall off my wrist and I'll lose it. I keep it close to me though, it's always next to me, in my night stand.

I guess this is one of the few things I cherish and love. It's corny, but...I take the purple jade bracelet out whenever something happens, whenever I need space. I guess jade is great at making people feel better. If I had a choice, I'd go to the beach or something to unwind, but that's just me.

Friday, February 26, 2016

Two necklaces

I would probably forget these stories one day, so I'm writing it down now.

This is the story of two necklaces, one of them was silver, with two small hearts intertwined with each other. The other was a handmade pearl necklace with a small circular gold clasp.

Let's start off with the pearl necklace.
I mentioned in an earlier post that Johnathan's family liked me a fair bit. Well, I guess this is proof. I went over to Johnathan's house a few days before I graduated from high school, and a few days before he left to tour with SCVC. I don't really remember much, but I remember that Johnathan had come downstairs and handed me this light pink chiffon bag. I asked him what it was, and he just told me to open it. I opened it, and there was this really pretty pearl necklace. I was shocked, to say the least. Johnathan told me his mom had made it for my graduation and that the gold clasp was real gold and everything. I was touched. I remember going up to his mom and thanking her profusely. She smiled and said "you're welcome". I didn't want to take the necklace off afterwards. It was something I held near and dear for a while.

The silver heart necklace.
So about this one...it was graduation day. I was literally about to step foot in the car to drive over to my HS graduation ceremony when this car pulls up and all of a sudden Johnathan jumps out. He runs up to me, hands me another chiffon bag, and hugs me. I was surprised. We had talked the night before, and I knew he couldn't make it to my ceremony because he was officially starting his tour with SCVC by going to Great America and performing in the parade. I thought he left already, because he couldn't come to my graduation or see me off to it. But he managed to make time for me; something he always did. Anyways, he handed me the bag, pretty much told me to have fun and be safe, and then he was off in the car driving away again. I opened the bag, and I could not believe it. He had gotten me this really delicate necklace, that had two hearts intertwined together. It was beautiful. I wore that necklace everyday (even showered with it on/slept with it on too). It meant so much to me. I wore it to Europe, I wore it everywhere I went.

I would like to point out that I'm not really a materialistic type of person, but grand gestures like this are too much for me. I end up thinking about these things often. If someone is kind to me, or gives me anything, like, a handwritten note, I will keep it. I keep the kind gestures and things people do for me. I guess maybe because there's a limited amount of kindness out in the world, it's nice to get reminders of it every so often.

On a side note, here's part of an opera that I really like. I like the lyrics about the two lovers sitting on a park bench. If you have the time, give it a listen. I find it to be moving and beautiful.

Monday, January 19, 2015

Please be okay

A lot of things happened today, and I would like to get them out.

For starters, I think, I sincerely hope, that I helped save a life today.

One of my friends was depressed and slightly suicidal. He and his girlfriend had broken up a month ago, and he wasn't taking it well. I knew he was getting drunk and everything, and I was worried about him. I had another friend check up on him, and apparently everything was all good with him yesterday. But tonight things went wrong. Very wrong.

I'm still in Hawaii and it's nighttime and my brother and I were getting ready to leave the room to explore. I was texting my friend and he asked me a strange question about his wrist and if there were any nerves or important things on the top of it. I immediately thought that he was going to cut himself, so I kept saying that he shouldn't do it, that if he did it'll hurt me and other people as well. My brother and I left the room at this point and we're just playing in the water, and I was casually texting my friend. I didn't hear my text tone or feel the vibration so I didn't know he texted me back until my phone started ringing. He called me and I answered. He was drunk and giddy and he kept saying that he "did it." I knew what he meant but I wanted confirmation so I kept asking questions about what he did. He said he drew happy faces, and I asked where the happy faces were. He said that they were on his arm and I asked what he used to draw the happy faces, and he said he used a razor. That's all I needed to know to kick into overdrive. He hung up with me and I called my friend who lives in the same town as us. He didn't respond, so I tried my friend's ex-girlfriend, because she had previously texted me earlier to see how I was doing. I let her know what was happening and what he was doing to keep her updated.

I wasn't sure what I should do because I wasn't sure if he was suicidal or anything. My friend that lives in the same town as us called me back and I explained to him what was happening. He wasn't sure what I should do or what he should do. I told him that I was going to call the local police and see if they could give me advice on what to do. I told my friend that he should go and check up on him, but to hold off so I can make a decision on what to do. I guess we were in mutual agreement that if he got worse, my friend would go over and see what he could do. My brother recommended that I should not call the police (what I was planning on doing), that I should call the suicide hotline number and ask what I should do. I called hotline and asked them what I should do. They were helpful enough and said I was doing the right thing by sending a friend over to check on him, and that if my friend developed a plan, time frame, or anything like that, that's when I should call the police.

I was continuously texting my unhappy friend and making sure he was alright and checking up on him, when all of a sudden he stops responding to my texts. I get a frantic text from his ex girlfriend telling me that I need to call him as soon as possible. I called him and asked him what was wrong, and apparently he had texted me but I didn't receive it til later. I read the text and found out what had upset him, and he then told me that he didn't want to talk, and he wanted to be alone and he wasn't going to speak to me for a while. I respected that and hung up with him.

About 20 minutes later, the unhappy friend wanted to FaceTime with me, and I accepted, and he was in awful shape. He looked slightly insane. He showed me his cuts, he was shaking and smiling and telling me he wasn't okay, and his sentences were all over the place. The one thing he said that triggered me to help was that he said he needed help. I've been telling him for so long that he needs help, but he always said he didn't. This time he did, and I wanted to act on it even though I'm thousands of miles away. He wanted to hang up on me, but I wanted him to stay on FaceTime with me a bit longer, but he just hung up. I then called my friend that lives in the same town as us right away to tell him what had just happened. Luckily my friend said that unhappy friend had just called  him (didn't really say anything) and that friend who lives in same town was on his way to check on unhappy friend.

Friend that lives in same town goes to unhappy friend's house and unhappy friend immediately tells him to go take him to the police station so he could turn himself in. He turns himself in and friend who lives in same town leaves to call me about what just happened.

And that's where my story will end for now. I don't know. I really want him to be okay, and yeah. I'm grateful that my friends were here and there when I needed them the most. Also, keep in mind, when all of this is happening I'm walking around Waikiki, trying to be normal while having all this going on, and it was really eating at me. Keep in mind that this is the ultra short, condensed version of what was happening.

That's why I'm still awake. I know that my friend is safe, but I'm still worried. There isn't anything I can do though. As soon as I get back, I'll be able to do more, but for now, I can't do anything, and that's what I hate the most. I want to believe that I saved someone's life today, but at the same time I know that I didn't. I just orchestrated everything. And yeah, that's cool too. If I could, I would be a superhero. But I just don't have the time and energy to save the world. I can try, though. I feel like I did the right thing, but I also feel guilty because I wasn't there physically to help.

Anyways, huge shout out to the friend that's in town for helping me out so much. I owe you big time. I can't thank you enough for being there when I needed you. I'm so glad you're one of my closest friends.

M and E

A few days ago I met this amazing two year old boy. We'll call him M for privacy concerns.

He's had a tough life, and I'm really happy he's safe and happy where he is now.

So, here's a back story about M.
His parents divorced very soon after M was born. Because his father was in the military services, M's mom and dad had joint custody. So of course, for the first few months M was with his mom. M would spend nine months with his mom, and nine months with his dad/grandparents, I guess. I know that M's grandpa retired to help take care of him, and they live in a different state. I think the M's dad lives with his parents, but is currently out of state working and going to school. I'm not sure how the set up worked. Anyways, M's mom got a boyfriend, and around this time M was around 18 months. His grandparents had just had M for the past few months, and M was around 25 pounds, which I guess is healthy for that age. M goes back to his mom for the next few months, and then comes back to his grandparent's house. When the grandparents got him back, they were shocked to see that he was a whopping like, 9 pounds. He lost weight while at his mom's house. Now, this part gets a little fuzzy for me because I'm not sure what happened, and this part might be out of order. So M is at his mom's house and he suddenly becomes unconscious. M's mom and her boyfriend call 911 and get him to the hospital. Now, an extended family member from the dad's side just so happened to check her Facebook (wasn't deleted from the friend's list) and saw that M's mom was tagged in a status that involved M. Apparently M had a seizure and was in a half coma and things were not looking well. So the family member immediately contacted the grandparent who had no idea what was happening, and tried booking a flight out to be with their grandson immediately. M's dad was already on the way. (Small detail I left out: the M's mom and boyfriend lied to the hospital staff and said that they were the parents. The grandparents called the hospital for more information and the hospital staff was confused because they thought the biological dad was the boyfriend. So there was a lot of documents that were being faxed, and CPS was called.) Long story short, M was being abused, mentally and physically. When M got to the hospital, they found out he had multiple broken bones that were healing at different stages, he had a brain hemorrhage that caused his seizures, and every time the boyfriend would step into the hospital room while M wasn't in a half coma, he would scream and cry. His abuse was so bad that M couldn't feel his legs anymore and whenever he was given food, he would hoard it because he thought people would take it away from him. M's brain hemorrhage prevented him from doing a lot of things. He had to relearn walking and talking. They didn't know how bad the damage would be from the hemorrhage and to prepare for the worst. The hemorrhage had affected the majority of the left side of his brain. They weren't sure if he would be able to walk, talk and function normally.

The good news about M is that as of now, he's doing much better. He's talking more, he can walk, and he's well on his way to recovery. He's doing great. Just looking at him you wouldn't have known he had gone through all of this. He's one brave boy, and I admire him. He's adorable, and what shocked me the most was that he wasn't afraid of me or my dad or my mom. He actually went up to me and said "Hi!" and grabbed at my hand. He really liked me. And he would love to be carried and he would grab things and give them to me. Whatever he did, he would always come back to me, and that really made me appreciate him. He's been through so much at such a young age, but yet, he still has trust. I know he's still a baby, and he doesn't know any better, but the fact that he's made such a remarkable recovery is just amazing in itself.

Here's another story about a girl named E.

I've known E since she was a baby. Her story starts off sad, but has a good ending. So my mom's friends, we'll call them J and V, went to China on vacation once. I guess they were walking by a dumpster or an alley or where ever, and they hear this baby crying inside the dumpster. So they picked out the baby girl and brought her to the orphanage. Again, this part gets a little fuzzy for me because remember what happens, but they left China after they brought her to the orphanage, but they couldn't stop thinking about her and her future. So once they got back to the States, they decided they wanted to adopt the baby girl they found in the dumpster. After years of going through the system and a lot of visits, they finally brought her home. 

She's really something. She's smart, talented and completely fearless. When I met her she was only a baby, but I got to watch her grow up over time. She's in fourth grade now, and it's like, "wow, how time flies." I guess the best part about this is that she has parents that actually love her who care about her a lot. When she was old enough to talk and communicate, she was absolutely fearless. She really liked talking to me and she really took a shine to me (yeah, all these kids like me). I remember one year, I wasn't able to see her, and my parents were there and apparently she remembered me and wanted to talk to me! So they put her on the phone and we had a nice talk. I can't remember what we talked about but we talked. I saw her a few days ago. Wow, she's grown. She's a lot more, self-aware, in the sense of she's really quiet now, didn't talk as much as she used to. But that's okay. She's also talented in the way that she plays piano, has concerts, and is also in choir and she sings. She's going to do great things, I just know it. And she's adorable. Reminds me a little bit of myself when I was younger.

End.

Monday, December 22, 2014

Christmas Time.

This time of the year reminds me of this memory I have. It's going to be a short memory because I can't remember every detail like I used to.

It was a few years ago. I was still in high school. I remember I was getting ready to go to a holiday/Christmas BBQ at Joe's house (my percussion instructor). I was going to drive over there and everything with Johnathan (my "interest" at the time, never officially dated, was never in a relationship, although I wanted to be, and we did practically everything together. My family had accepted him as my "boyfriend", when really he was just my best friend/friend. He met everyone in my family, even my extended family, and I met his family as well, and they liked me a fair amount.)

Anyways, in the car, my mom was driving me and she told me that Johnathan accidentally left something in the glove compartment of the car. So, I open the glove compartment, and pull out this ziplock bag, and I said, "What idiot left this stupid ziplock bag in here." I didn't even look at it, It just registered in my mind that it was a ziplock bag and nothing else. I put the bag back in the glove compartment, and my mom was like, "...uh...that was for you." I responded with my typical, "Wait, what?" And I pulled out the ziplock and actually looked at what was inside it. It was a typewriter necklace. I cherished that thing so much. It was made of brass, it was long, and it even had a little piece of card paper stuck into it like a real typewriter. I immediately wore it as soon as I took it out of the bag. We got home, and Johnathan was there waiting for me. He was like, "So, did you get the present?" And of course, my mom told him the embarrassing story of how I totally screwed up, and actually accidentally insulted him. 

Apparently the two of them (mom and Johnathan) planned this. Johnathan had contacted my mom and told him his brilliant plan (because he didn't want to wrap it, but he did want to surprise me), and he just ended up sticking it into the glove compartment as a last minute surprise effort.

Honestly, it was probably one of the cutest, slightly romantic gestures that anyone's ever done for me. I still have the necklace, I've never actually worn it out since that first day, mainly because I don't want to ruin it, and two because I don't have anything to wear with it. 

I'm thinking about wearing it to work tomorrow. I think it'll look nice with whatever I chose to wear. Besides, I think it's time for it to make an appearance again. The best part about the necklace is that it has a story behind it. And I think that's the best, when things have stories or sentimental value behind them.

Sunday, October 19, 2014

A Beach Story

It was a mild morning, perfect California weather. I only lived eight blocks from the ocean, so I decided to walk down to the shore to do some sea glass hunting. I have this small jar at home filled with sea glass and I love holding the jar up to the light and watch the whites, greens, browns and specks of blue reflect onto the walls.

I slipped on my flip flops, grabbed an empty zip lock bag and headed down towards the beach. What a beautiful day.The seagulls were soaring high over head, a light breeze blew through the trees, and there were colorful sailboats and windsurfers out in the ocean. I smiled at the sight and wished I brought my camera to capture this beautiful moment. I started walking along the shoreline, trying to find sea glass as well as sea shells to add to my small collection.

It was late afternoon by the time I finished. I had my flip flops in one hand, and in the other I held my zip lock bag that was filled with brown, green, and white sea glass. I was slightly disappointed because I wanted to find rare and exquisite colors like red, yellow and blue, but luck was not with me. I was heading back up the shoreline to my home when I happened to look to my left at the ocean. The sun was setting and the ocean was sparkling, catching the sun's last rays. Everything looked so beautiful; I stopped to take it all in for a moment. I walked towards the sea, and stopped in the incoming tide. Woosh woosh, the sea said. To me, it sounded like it was saying wish wish and that's what I did. I closed my eyes and made a wish. I opened my eyes and smiled one last smile at the sea, and then I turned to walk away.

I took one step forward and I went flying headfirst into the sand.
"Whoa! What the heck?! Who would put something here?!" I said, after I spit out a mouthful of sand.
I bent down and examined the object that sent me flying.

It was a seemingly empty green glass beer bottle that had a cork in it. I picked it up and took a closer look. There was this odd misty...thing inside the bottle.
What the...what is this? I shook the bottle a bit and the mist faded away.
Then, all of a sudden, a white misty face with wild eyes appeared in the bottle and stared at me. I gasped and dropped the bottle.
"OUCH. Why'd you drop me for?! Just because I don't have a body doesn't mean you can just manhandle and drop me like a hot potato! Jerk! I have feelings too you know! And I don't appreciate it when people wake me up from my millennium of sleep."
"Wha-...y-y-you...can talk?" I was doing an excellent job of understanding things today. This...thing just told me that it's been sleeping for a millennium and all I got out of it was that it could talk to me.
"Of course I can, you idiot. Just because I'm made of mist, doesn't mean that my brain is too! Dummy..." The mist thing scoffed at me.

By this time, I was getting used to the fact that a disembodied head was talking to me, and I decided I was tired of it berating me. Especially since we didn't exchange pleasantries yet.
"Mr. Disembodied head, mist, sir, dude, whatever, I don't appreciate you being so RUDE to me after I just woke you up out of your nice slumber. Not many people can sleep through a millennium  you know. Even if they wanted to. Wait...how did you know it's been a millennium if you just woke up? I never told you the date, nor is there a calendar or anything that says the date around here. And who exactly ARE you anyways?"
"Well, well, well. Aren't you Miss Observant? Good job, I give you an A+ for being this observant. If I had arms, I'd give you a nice shiny golden star. I know a millennium has passed because that's when they told me I'd wake up. My identity is not important to you at the moment, and it won't be for a while. Any other questions?"
"So...you were placed here? Why?"
"Wow, you caught that, huh? You're smarter than you look. I was placed here because something horrible will happen in a few weeks. I was placed here to find you actually. Because you're supposed to stop this horrible thing from happening. I don't understand why they couldn't give me arms or legs...and a body would be nice too...well, they're idiots anyways. But now that I've found you we can get started on things."
"Who is they and...how do you know something horrible will happen, and why do I have to stop it? What if it was an accident that I found you and you're supposed to be waiting for someone else?"
"My, you certainly ask a lot of questions. You'll get all your answers later on. We need to get to somewhere private. You should probably put me in a bag or something, you wouldn't want people freaking out seeing you carrying a disembodied head that can talk, do you? And once we get to somewhere that's more private, I'll answer some of your questions. Now get moving! It's getting cold in this stupid bottle I'm in."

Bedtime story

[Originally posted 4/22/12, 10:37PM PDT]

Dang it...
So, once upon a time there was a boy who was named Pumpkinhead. He was named Pumpkinhead because his head looked like and resembled a pumpkin. Pumpkinhead was a very nice boy, and he was a close cousin to Humpty Dumpty (before Humpty had that great fall). Pumpkinhead wasn't very outgoing. In fact, he was very shy. His parents used to never let him go outside because they were afraid he would be made fun of.

So one day, agains his parent's expressed wishes, he decided to venture outside to play with the other children. "Hi. I'm Pumpkinhead," he told the other children. "Can I come play with you?" The other children just laughed at him and called him names. Feeling rejected, Pumpkinhead went home and vowed never to return to those children. Eventually, Pumpkinhead moved away from his parents and made his own home in the woods. One day while he was relaxing by the fire, someone knocked on the door. He opened the door, and there was a woman who's head looked like a squash. "Hi. I'm Squashhead. Can I stay with you?" Pumpkinhead had never seen such a beautiful woman and married her right away. They lived happily ever after as vegetable farmers.